Sunday, October 21, 2012
Gender Roles
I have always had mixed feelings on letting my daughter watch Disney movies because of the gender roles portrayed. The plot of the movie is usually a princess that ends up in trouble, a man that helps her out of that trouble, and then the impending marriage. The video on YouTube that showcased these ideas was a great idea. I think it is easy to fall into the trap that I did when it comes to these movies. When she was younger I didn't see if having very much impact on her, but you don't when you're in the middle of it, do you? Now that she is five I am seeing that it has too much influence on her. I am not only talking about Disney movies, but any of the children's movie that showcase that same mentality. After watching one of those movies I hear comments from her like "Why aren't you married?", "My hair is ugly.", or "I want to wear this super short skirt and your boots because it's pretty.". Needless to say, I have minimized her exposure to these types of movies and shows. I have had countless discussions with her regarding what should be considered "pretty" and how unrealistic the roles she sees in these movies are. I like the idea of her being exposed to some of these stereotypes so it opens the door for us to discuss why they aren't appropriate and why she doesn't have to be any of those things to be a beautiful and wonderful person.
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That is great to talk to your kids and let them know the difference between T.V. and the real world. Always letting your kids know that they are pretty just the way they are is important, so they don't think they need things to make them pretty. My son likes to watch a lot of the teenage sitcom shows and I sit and watch them with him to see what he is watching and some are very good, but there are a few that I have told him that I don't want him to watch. Either the shows portray the wife as being a slave around the house or they show the man being pushed around by the wife. I remind him that that is not how a spouse is suppose to treat their partner. It takes two to make a relationship work and a whole lot of give.
ReplyDeleteI think a lot of little girls want to be princesses at one point or another. My 20 year old was obsessed with princess Jasmine when she was 3 but believe me did not buy into the waiting to be rescued mentality. She is ferociously independent and brave. I think your right talking about it with your daughter,as she gets older you will have so many more conversations about images and expectation. She will take her lead from you, the things that you value about her will be the things she learns to value about herself.
ReplyDeleteI think it is awesome that you are creating open dialog with your daughter about how unrealistic these movies are and that they are not like real life. I bet that when your daughter takes her first psychology or development class she is going to remember how you talked to her about the disney and little kid movies and she will be SO happy that you did. When I was 15 my mom brought home "sex and the city" for us to watch together (she didn't fully understand what the show was about until we started watching a few episodes lol). Anyway, she finally paused it during an episode and said, "Allie, this show is stupid, All these women are independent and strong and have amazing careers... and for some reason, none of that matters to them--all that matters to them is that they get a man. They should be very happy with what they have." I always remember her saying that because it had a really positive impact on me at that boy-crazy age.
ReplyDeleteI like how you handle the situation by explaining to her what the reality of beauty is on the level that a 5 year old can understand. We can't protect our children from every bad portrayal of what media or people say how people should look or act but by taking the steps your taking with your daughter at such a young age it will make her realize and accept herself for her and not what other people think of her.
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